In memory of a brother.

It's been awhile but I'm back. After much anticipation, yet another chapter in the life of none other.. Me. Considering the fact that it's way past my bedtime, I still can't find a reason why I can't go to bed. It's officially 2 months and 1 week from his passing. About time I blog about him. All the many escapades we never share with others. Countless nights we spent star gazing, sitting in my car just chilling and growing up. Yes, the love of my life, the brother I never had - Shobaan.

Have I ever told you how we 1st met? Well, here it goes. Life was simple for me back then. The good, childish little boy I was. I finally grew to be in Secondary School. It wasn't exactly the 1st day of the school year but I was late. I was admitted later than most students into the then prestigious school - Victoria Institution. As it was my 1st day in school, I kept to myself most of the time. Met a few friends that would later on grow to be besties. Anyway, that's just a little prelude. It all happened on the way home. Public transport was the only option since my parents were usually busy with work. Alone and young, I was scared of the world around me. Tonnes of people surrounded me, quietly waiting for the arrival of their train ride home. School have only finished moments ago. "The 1st day of school.. not too bad", I thought to myself. Soon, I was aboard a giant, metallic vehicle slowly crawling it's tracks to each stop. Sri Petaling was the last stop and my destination. Soon, the teeming crowd lessened to a miserable few passengers. I minded my own business as I sat quietly in a corner of my own.
Footsteps echoed through the nearly empty carriage. As I looked up, someone caught my gaze. "Hi, are you from VI too?", a young indian chap approached and exclaimed. Almost instantly, his hand shot out from his side gesturing for a handshake. Obliged and shy, I lifted my hand and clasped it onto his. It was that moment, that handshake that changed my life. It was never the same again.
Our friendship grew as time drew on. Soon enough, Jack can never be seen without Shobaan next to him and vice versa. We were inseparable. We shared everything and talked all day. His company was uncomparable. Lovable, fun and straightforward. There was none other like him. Blunt and direct as he was, he was also someone that cared. 1st impressions never did too well for him it seems. Many disliked the idea of him around but soon everybody felt right at home having him around.
It was about 7 years and 7 months since our 1st meeting when it happened. All the promises we had for each other. You and I against the world. Us growing old together having grandchildren. Laughing, seeping on fine wine or sitting in chinese coffee shops till late at night talking about our past. The things we were going to do. My 21st birthday celebration. All of that and MORE. I thought it was true. Boy, was I wrong. Torn down and shattered like a mirror hitting the ground, it happened. The time was 6.30am, 10th September 2009. I was on the way home from Subang when I received a phone call. It was Shobaan or so I thought it was. As I picked up the call thinking it was him reconfirming our breakfast plans, another voice could be heard from the other end instead. The voice was familiar but did not register. "Tiru? ", I exclaimed. It was his girlfriend. She sounded in shock and worried.

"What's the matter?", I asked.

"It's Shobaan.. something.. something bad's happened. I don't know if he's alright or not. He got into an accident.. it was bad.."

From that moment on, my world was thrown into a void of darkness. Could it be? Did something really bad happen? Was this all a joke? As I rushed to the hospital, all these thoughts were swimming in my head. What could have possibly gone wrong?

Being greeted by tear stained faces and shaking voices always left distaste in my mouth as it runs dry. No words could ever comfort such happenings. Nothing could ever be done to undo what's happened. The Forensics Department it was called. What a joke. As I got there, I realized where I was, it was a morgue. Stunned and afraid, I was guided into a cold, empty room. Lying lifeless on the metal table was my best friend. -End-

A bitter ending it was to this tale. But all is not lost. Brother, I miss you more than anything in the world. Guess it's just you watching my back now. I stay up nights crying for your passing but nothing more can be done. At times I think of you and wish you were here but I know it's not possible. Here is a tribute to you. You'll always live in our hearts. As a brother, lover, son and friend. Here's to you.

To have lived the fullest life is not about how old you are or how good your life was, it is about being remembered when you are long gone.

-SucidalAct-